I belong to an email homeschool support group, but haven't been active with an in-person type of group for several years. When we began homeschooling I had 3 children, ages 7, 2, and an infant. Our local homeschool support group provided much needed assistance and information about the ins and outs of homeschooling. My family was very active and participated in every available opportunity.
As the years passed and more children joined our family, we continued to belong to local groups, but chose our activities to meet our growing needs. My children and I made many close friends and enjoyed play-dates frequently. Eventually, we stopped attending the support group activities and just got together with friends.
Lately, I've noticed that almost all of my homeschool friends are finished homeschooling. Most of them had fewer children than I and are struggling to finding their new vocation. Our lives have reached different stages and our common bond of homeschooling no longer exists.
My oldest daughter begins her senior year at college next week. My second child begins her senior year of high school. My youngest child is 4 and will be starting phonics instruction in September. The other children are in various elementary, middle school and high school levels.
Our family joined a local support group this year at the request of some of the children. The kids are excited about meeting more people and making new friends. I'm less enthusiastic. I don't fit in with the young moms beginning their homeschool journey. Finding the perfect reading program and being thrilled when Suzy reads her first Bob Book is not exciting to me. I'll be happy for Allie when she reads her first book, but frankly I'm bored with Mat and Sam (the characters in the first Bob Books.)
I don't have a lot in common with the moms of the homeschool teens either. They talk about family field trips to see Shakespeare live (My youngest two children would be bored to tears), having large teen parties at their homes (Not if I want the younger two girls to get any sleep and not be cranky the following day), and enjoying the freedom of having more alone time (not at my house).
It seems like I'm complaining and I'm really not. My children are loving, thoughtful, helpful, hard-working, and fun to be around. We laugh and enjoy each others company. It's just so hard to find someone in a similar situation. God has blessed me with my large family, with children in a wide range of age groups. I have gotten to continue to play with Play Doh for over 20 years. It's lovely to watch my older children grow into adulthood. It's just a little lonely.
2 comments:
From the blogs I'm reading recently, it seems like lots of us are lonely right now. I'm in a rural area without many opportunities for play dates or educational outings with other families and very few SAHM. Lots are missing the days when they went on educational outings with other families now that their children are in high school or college. I'm glad you posted this. It shows that even with children a wide range of ages, you can feel the same way. I don't have an answer nor am I at the same stage of life as you, but I have lots of sympathy.
Our age spread is smaller (oldest was almost 11 when baby was born), but I know that feeling well. Around here it's magnified because there are few homeschoolers and fewer large families. No wonder most of my friends at church are old enough to be my mother or even grandmother. ;)
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